In the contemporary world, we’ve turned into sheep; following whatever carrot is dangling in front of us, constantly following popular culture, looking at what is trendy, and emulating what the media tells us is hip and cool. But we forget to look inward. We are constantly swayed by modern ideologies that shapes our thoughts, actions, and how we date. We have a habit of forgetting about one’s own place within society that often leads to low self-esteem and higher degrees of awkwardness in social situations, and we tend to blend in rather than stand out. Do you want women to find you attractive? Don’t blend in. Stand out!
If you find yourself simply merging into the background at social events and parties, feeling uncomfortable talking to strangers worried that you don’t belong or fit in, then you definitely aren’t sure of who you are. Do some soul searching. Figure out what do other people have that you don’t.
If one man can go out there and artfully work the room, so you can. Start looking at your identity, and develop this by understanding what motivates and energizes you.
Being sure of yourself and zealous about your identity and the passions makes you command respect in any social scenario, which strengthens you. In the beginning you will fall victim to other people’s identity, but it is only through failure that you can grow. To truly overcome this, startprojecting the things you are passionate about into your social interactions, and you will not only be the life of the party, but the center of female attraction too!
How To Avoid Becoming A Wallflower?
In a social setting, never be the guy standing by the wall with your drink up to your chest watching everyone having fun while you’re not. Don’t be that wallflower. Mentally stalking a woman in the crowd waiting for the right moment when she is alone to strike is creepy because women are more socially aware and intuitive about the energy of the room and people. Instead, spark a conversation about something specifically relating to the environment than her and avoid canny pick up lines:
You: “Did it hurt?”
Her: “What?”
You: “When you fell from heaven?”
Lame!
Instead, here is a challenge; As soon as you enter into a social setting and you lock eye contact with a random person, could be a man or a woman, you have three seconds to engage that person no matter what is happening at the moment. If you don’t, then your buddy, being a good accountability partner, will administer punishable consequences to get you back on track. It could be in the form of giving your buddy twenty dollars, buying a drink, lunch, or doing a physical exercise such as 50 push-ups out in the parking lot. The reason behind the consequences is to program your brain to associate pain towards not approaching women within the first three seconds of locking eye contact.
Go approach random people and say hello. Mingle. Do not talk for too long though because it can become boring feeling like she is being held hostage in the conversation. After a small talk either leave and on to the next group or introduce her to other people that you met in the room. It doesn’t have to be that you know these people very well. No one is going to question you.
And if she is in a mixed group, always acknowledge the man first, casually converse with him until you eventually make your way down the line to her. Be the link that connect people together not the wallflower.
